Scientists in Brazil recently unearthed a new species of spiderthat they named the Iandumoema smeagol, a nod to Smeagol, one of the characters from J.R.R. Tolkiens The Lord of the Rings. However, as Stephen Colbertnoted on Fridays Late Show, while these scientists might know a lot about arachnids, they have much to learn about Middle Earth.
Colbert, a Tolkien obsessive, took umbrage with the scientists decision and launched into a long lecture about why naming a spider after Smeagol is foolish. They named it Smeagol because its scary-looking and lives in caves. Okay, thats cute. Got two problems with this, Colbert told his audience before quickly reciting the history of Smeagol, a kind of friendly Hobbit-like creature who eventually morphs into Gollum, who is scary-looking and lives in caves. You should have named the spider Gollum. You dont discover a venomous snake and name it Anakin; you name it Darth Vader.
Colberts second point is that, if youre going to name a spider after a Lord of the Rings character, then why not name it after the character that is a spider: Shelob. The last offspring of Ungoliant, whose poison killed the Two Trees and who consumes light and vomits darkness. You know spiders, the host said, schooling the experts. I thought you guys were scientists. This is sad.