It ended with a scream, and a million questions, only one of which really matters: How could it have ended any other way?
The two-part finale of Twin Peaks long-awaited third season/reboot/revival/Return marks the conclusion of the most elaborate bait-and-switch in television history. For 18 episodes, co-creators David Lynch and Mark Frost deftly played on a quarter century of audience hopes, fears and great expectations created by the shows two original seasons, a prequel film and a host of fake dossiers and diaries. We wanted to see lost loves reunited, losers redeemed, villains vanquished. We wanted a reckoning with the dark forces of the Black Lodge demons and doppelgangers and the apparent prime mover of it all, oddly named Judy. Audrey Horne must be sprung from her purgatorial limbo. The good Dale Coopermust defeat his shadow self.Laura Palmershould have peace at last.
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And for a while, at least, it seemed thats where we were headed. The bulk of the first hour is a crackerjack supernatural thriller in the vein of the originl finale that trapped Coop in the Lodge all those years ago. As the agent and his unlikely allies race toward Twin Peaks, Dale is outrun by his doppelganger, who uses the coordinates gleaned from the late Major Briggs(reappearing as a disembodied, floating head, because of course) to alley-oop himself right into the Sheriffs Department parking lot. As the black-eyed phony ingratiates himself with Deputy Andy, Sheriff Frank Trumanand the rest of the force, crooked cop Chad Broxford attempts a jailbreak. Meanwhile the eyeless woman Naido chirps and squawks like an alarm triggered by the evil entitys presence.
Then the stations receptionist Lucy blows the fake Coop away after receiving a phone call from the real deal, and Freddie, the superpowered Brit, bashes his cell door right into Chads face. The whole gang then assemble in the Sheriffs office to watch the young Englishman do battle with a black orb imbued with the power and visage of Bob, the maniacal demon responsible for Lauras rape and murder years ago. When the entitys power is shattered, Naido transforms into Diane the real Diane this time, Coopers one-time executive assistant and love interest, now with a shock of fire-engine red hair.
As lights flicker and fade, Cooper, Diane, and Gordon Cole warp into the bowels of Benjamin Hornes Great Northern Hotel, where Dale uses his hotel key to unlock an unmarked door and return to the other side. Hes joined by Mike, the One-Armed Man, whose recitation of the Fire walk with me poem surely sent a chill up every Peaks freaks spine. The white knight and his guide commune with the spirit of Philip Jeffries, his FBI antecedent, enabling him to witness the last night of Lauras life. But between her tearful goodbye to James and her rendez-vous with fate, our hero intercedes, taking her by the hand and leading her right out of the timestream.
We flash back to her body, wrapped in plastic on the shore but it flickers then disappears from view. When the episode shows us the first few minutes of shows premiere Josie Packard putting on her makeup, Pete Martell telling his wife Catherine hes going fishing its a perfectly normal morning, not a corpse in sight. It seems like Coop has succeeded in sparing Laura from her fate. Until we cut to the present-day Palmer home, where we hear an ungodly wailing from her mother Sarah, who suddenly lurches into the frame, throws her daughters photo to the floor and stabs it repeatedly with a bottle of booze. The girl herself then vanishes from Coopers grasp.
Thats when it cuts to Episode 18. And thats when it all goes wrong.
Yes, theres one last moment of success for our hero, when Cooperstulpareunites with Janey-E and Sonny Jim to live out the rest of his days as Dougie Jones in peace and harmony. But when the actual Dale passes through the Lodge, hes reliving many of the same events and exchanges he had during the first few episodes. He winds up in a car with Diane, the two of them willingly passing through some unseen border in the desert. Day turns to night. Coop, acting equal parts like his own noble self and his cold, calculating doppelganger, has sex with his companion in a seedy motel. (Laura Dern, by the way, is an absolute marvel in this sequence her face is a canvas of love and pain, her hands distorting then covering her lovers face to avoid seeing whats there.
The next morning, shes gone, leaving behind a Dear John note addressed to Richard from Linda the names that the Giant/Fireman warned Cooper about in the seasons first scene. The Fed finds himself in a town called Odessa, where he roughs up a few local tough guys and grabs the address of a diner waitress on a hunch. That waitress turns out to be Laura Palmer or so he thinks. As far as she knows, her name is Carrie Page; having apparently just murdered some dude in her living room, shes eager to get out of town. Dale says hell take her to Twin Peaks, Washington (D.C.? State), presumably to confront her mother who weve been led to believe has been possessed by Judy, the mother of all evils. The same Judy, in fact, of the Blue Rose project headed by Gordon Cole and Garland Briggs, in fact. Everythings going to be tied up nicely now.
Then, after an interminable night drive, Coop and Carrie arrive at the Palmers house. Only Sarahs not at home. The current resident is one Alice Tremond, who bought the house from a Mrs. Chalfont, who purchased it from persons unknown. Dale seems to recognize those names, and if youre a Peaks die-hard, you will too theyre monikers utilized by a Lodge spirit who appeared as an old woman in the original seasons and Fire Walk With Me.
Defeated, the two turn to leave, until Cooper stops in the middle of the street and turns back to face the house. What year is it? he asks, seemingly bewildered. Carrie doesnt answer. She turns and looks as well.
A distorted voice calls, Laura?
She screams.
The lights go out.
And as the image of Laura whispering into Coopers ear in the Lodge so long ago plays in slow motion, the credits roll.
So ends the con job that Lynch and Frost telegraphed from the seasons subtitle, The Return, on down. After all, the original Twin Peaks ended in the worst possible way: goodness corrupted, evil triumphant. Fire Walk With Me hinted at a way forward, only to linger on cruelty and suffering. Certainly nothing in Lynchs intervening filmography indicated that this story would have a happy ending. Why wouldnt we wind up right back where we started: an unspeakable violation, carving a hole in the moral fabric of the universe that no one, not even the whitest of knights, is capable of making whole?
This is Twin Peaks: The Return, alright. A return to pain that cant be healed, crimes that cant be solved, wrongs that cant be righted. We drank full. We descended. Theres no way up and out again.
Previously: From Her to Eternity