Jimmy Fallon mockedPresident Donald Trumpswild decision-making since taking office in a skit on The Tonight Show on Monday. Look people, Ive made my position on immigration very clear, Fallons Trump declared. When it comes to immigrants, you have two choices: either get out of here, or marry me.
In Fallons portrayal, Trump relies on random choice to dictate all his actions. Two or three people have been criticizing my executive orders, the spoof President acknowledged. They say theyre dangerous, crazy, and almost as though hes spinning a giant wheel and doing whatever it lands on. To those of you who say that: youre right.
It turns out that Fallons Trump picks cabinet members by lottery If the ball is white, I nominate a Wall Street insider; if the ball is black, I nominate Ben Carson and has a Huge Wheel of Decisions to determine his next political move. Possibilities include fire all teachers and outlaw falafel. Sure, repealing Obamacare isnt great, Trump says. But at least it didnt land on Nuke the moon just to see what happens.'
Fallon also riffed on a variety of already classic Trump tropes, including the size of his hands Imagine how hard it is to use vending machines and his penchant for inventing words like nextly and in conclusionally.
As the segment comes to a close, Fallons Trump pulls out a separate decision wheel to help him pick his nominee for the Supreme Court. Who made the cut? Kenny G, Kanye West, Capn Crunch and Big Bird.
Donald Trump signed an executive order on the construction of the Keystone and Dakota Access Pipelines. Watch here.