The intrepid reporters for Lie Witness News returned to the streets to find out what everyday Americans thought of the biggest events to definitely not happen in 2018 on Jimmy Kimmel Live Wednesday.
Perhaps because 2018 was so hectic, people were more than wiling to speak up on an array of outrageous non-events, whether it was scientists resurrecting the long-extinct saber-toothed tiger or the unfortunate passing of music legend Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart. Elsewhere, a woman celebrated the shattering of another glass ceiling after being told the first woman astronaut had been sent to the sun this year, while a man offered his very woke take on the Supreme Courts decision to legalize marriage between men and iPhones.
It really doesnt bother me because I dont know how to use an iPhone, the guy said. If I can get me a flip phone, Im good.
The bit also featured one man insisting that he and his friends watched authorities cart an impeached President Trump off to jail, while another guy vividly remembered his reaction to watching North Korea get annihilated in a nuclear blast: I was like, Its lit out here!'